Seeking serious taker

Added: Adrien Taft - Date: 04.07.2021 18:12 - Views: 26794 - Clicks: 794

After we were married, we discovered that we were very different people. I loved her and she loved me. This has created stress on our marriage for almost forty years. In this article I want to share with you some secrets that we have learned that you may be able to use when you find yourself living with someone who is very different from you in taking risks. I believe these principles also apply to people you work with because some of the same dynamics are at play.

He knows us very well so he sent each of us the assessment separately rather than having us do it together. He said he would simply average them together, knowing we would approach the assessment very differently. Why would anyone do that if they upside would be 16 percent with 80 percent certainty? Well… that is why this article came to be!

Risk taking is a natural RED strength. They believe that fruit is attainable even though there is some risk involved in climbing out on the limb. That has been their experience and they gain great satisfaction in bringing about that accomplishment, especially breaking through barriers to the goal.

They tend to be a glass half full rather than half empty kind of people. They downplay the danger in favor of the potential benefit. Change is usually the solution to a problem. If you keep doing the same thing over and over again and hoping for a different result, you must be insane! Change is not risky for a RED. It is risky not to change. Risk is what enables you to advance. Can I hear an amen? Life has a way of going poorly so playing it safe makes more sense. Why subject yourself to more stress?

Slow and steady is more reasonable. All this change and risky behavior is not exciting and adventurous. It is foolish and off putting. There is a conflict in fundamental values taking place. Being a winner is important to the risk taker. Being safe and protecting people is important to those who have placed risk taking lower in the order of values.

They would rather never have to risk unless they have no other choice. It is not an instinctive response. It is a survival response. For those who are risk adverse, risk actually is a trigger to stress. Nothing creates more stress than uncertainty. Who could blame them. The source of stress for a risk taker is just the opposite. It is anything that keeps them from exercising risk. When someone raises an objection to the uncertain idea or decision, it feels like the person is being blocked from being a success.

Something inside of them wants to fight for their idea. Risk takers are not dumb to the obstacles and downside, they just place more weight on the upside and the possibilities that exist if we would just step out on the branch. So how do we deal with the reality that we live with and work with people who have very different approaches to risk? Here are some tips to navigate the labyrinth of risk management in your relationships.

Be self-aware about why you are driven to take risks. Connecting the dots to your motives will enable you to gain perspective on your gut impulse. Without understanding this connection, risk can be overdone and turn into gambling. This will give you perspective an enable you to weight the downside realistically. In order to choose a strength that would help the risk adverse, you would need to have insight into the motivation of the risk adverse person. Why is that person risk adverse? What is the fear behind the aversion? Is it because they are fearful of how it will impact people?

Is it because there is no data or facts that support the outcome desired? This is the tip that has helped me the most. Stop and breathe. When decisions are made quickly that have risk. You run the danger of not bringing people with you. A good rule of thumb is to forgo decisions that have a quick time-table when you have risk adverse people from which you need their support.

This is true for a board, or for a spouse. Your gut may be saying go and go now, but if you go, you risk going alone. Or you may go and loose the confidence and affection of those who you care about. Connect your behavior to the reason behind it. Also understand that other people are not just gamblers, but value advancement which is not always certain.

Identify what you need to address to be on board. Be able to express what is important to you and what is needed. Our natural tendency under stress is to go into our overdone strength rather than chose a strength that will engage with other people. Rather than doing that, chose a strength that will engage the risk taker in dialogue. Many risk adverse people feel that to engage in anyway in a positive way to a risky idea is to pour gasoline on the fire that may destroy them!

How can I help you process the how that idea might be implemented and identify things that need to be done? Once you have done that, they are more likely to engage with you and you will have a more productive result. As a RED risk taker, I can tell you that the worst thing you can do when a new idea that seems risky come up, is to give as many reasons you can not to support the idea. Or even worse would be for you to dismiss the idea without engaging in serious conversation and consideration.

This is a sure-fire way of causing conflict, because you are trampling on their core motivation — to be a winner. Ten reasons why this would be a bad idea may flood into your mind immediately but avoid the temptation to spit them out all at once. Be inquisitive about why they want to do this. Ask about how they came to this conclusion. Then employ strengths that will engage the best way forward.

For example, you could offer to analyze data that support their conclusions and get back to them. Or you could offer to be systematic in developing a process of evaluating the merits of the idea. You get the idea. My wife and I are still married after 40 years. The truth is that my greatest strengths are the very things she fears the most. Risk taking is her lowest strength and it is in the top two for me. But life is much better when we move together and in agreement.

Looking back over the years, I can see where my risk taking was tempered and we made better decisions because both our strengths were allowed to flourish. That is what makes up a great team. Keep growing in relational intelligence! Our President, Dr. Bruce Terpstra, has 36 years of pastoral ministry experience. He is a veteran of 17 years in denominational leadership and developed more than 70 new churches in the New York metro area and has given oversight to almost pastors. Save my name, , and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

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Seeking serious taker

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