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March 8, 4 min read. Dear John: My sister Linda is in a tight spot. Linda first dated, and then was intimate with Eddie. When that relationship ended, Eddie's brother, Chris, asked her out. They started out as very close friends. Then, they became lovers. Chris has real feelings for her. Unfortunately, Linda says she is really in love with Eddie. Recently, Eddie told Linda that he was still in love with her, too. I think he's just trying to get back at his brother. What should she do? Let's hope it will have an ending worthy of Hollywood.
Whenever dealing with an issue that impacts a family member, you should move with great care. Boyfriends will come and go, but the relationship you have with Linda will last a lifetime, so be sure that your advice is only extended when requested. Here is what she should consider: First, she should cool it with both guys for, say, three or four months. By giving the situation some space and time , she'll be better able to sort out her feelings. At that time, if either guy or both still shows an interest, she should date the brother who has truly won her heart.
This dating process should begin again at Stage No. At any stage, should the relationship stall once again, both partners will have given it their best and will then feel free to move on with a free and open heart. Dear John: Every time my husband makes a mistake, he blames it on me! When I confront him about this, he blows up. Then, I cannot talk to him for weeks.
Another issue is that he is always telling me that I don't love him enough, and that I give all my attention to the kids. This is getting to be a big problem. This is my second marriage, so please help me do what I can to save it! Dear Get it Right: Unfortunately, your husband is not doing a great job of telling you what he needs in this marriage.
You have every right to be there for your children, and he should not resent this. At the same time, if you are committed to making the marriage work, both of you need to make time for each other. To do this, you should sit down together and work out a few issues. First on the agenda should be a discussion about ways in which you can communicate with love and respect. You should both commit to bringing up issues as they occur. You should also make a concerted effort to talk to each other without blame, or guilt. The goal here is to be successful in attaining mutual agreement or compromise.
A second item for discussion is the importance of spending time together. By making a serious effort to spend more time with him — arranging a sitter for two nights a week and occasional weekend getaways This could be something as simple as a baby-sitting trade with another couple — you can once again connect as you did prior to marriage. If you take the time to move beyond anger and toward resolution, you'll have the lasting relationship you so dearly want.
To find out more about John Gray and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www. Toggle . Like it? Share it! View Comments. Writer and mother Annie Lane writes in a voice that's sympathetic, funny and firm, offering common-sense solutions to life's dilemmas.
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When two brothers crush on the same girl